The thoughts and works of Christopher McMullen.

Phoenix, Arizona

I’ve been loving my time here so far. I flew out here on Saturday (well, I actually flew from Montana, to Colorado, to California, then to here) and spent the weekend with my parents. We got to cruise around the Phoenix/Scottsdale area in the beautiful evening weather before going to Chase Field on Sunday afternoon. They had the roof closed and if I’m going to be honest, it was weird. I had never watched a professional baseball game indoors before with air conditioning flowing onto my neck and shoulders. It was a really cool experience in a really nice ballpark, though (but it is hard to get into a game when you don’t really care who wins). After that, we went to Scottsdale Fashion Square (where they pretty much have everything), got a Johnny Rockets shake with a 5 Guys bacon burger before heading back to the hotel to watch Game 1 of the Spurs/Thunder series (which was definitely an exciting game). 

Now I’m here with my church staff and Foursquare leaders from around the world. It’s nice to see some old friends from college and catch up with some people. The messages have been really good so far and you can never go wrong with Matt Redman leading worship (unless you come up and talk after every two songs… let’s hope that doesn’t continue). I’m super excited to go to the worship break out sessions tomorrow with Mr. Redman. He is probably the worship leader that I respect the most and I can’t wait to hear from him (outside of his books).

It’s definitely time for a different season. After last night’s message, I could feel the Spirit stirring something inside of me, longing for something more. Maybe it’s a further continuing discontent for living an acceptable life and a deeper longing to live a glorifying one. There are a couple changes that have been taking place inside of me and in my life and I’m super excited about them, but at the same time, I have no idea what that necessarily looks like. What is this change of lifestyle going to entail? What is my relationship going to look like? What more can I do to live with a fervor to never stop pursuing God?

Last night, Wayne Cordeiro spoke about renewal and one of the things he said was that we need to not only focus on what God’s called of us, but to find the balance of that and knowing what God has NOT called us to. In other words, along with the recognition of God’s purpose for your individual life, it’s also important to realize what is not in your purpose. God did not design us for every calling, but for a unique, individual one and the more time we spend outside of that (even if it’s doing things for Him), the less time we spend on our specific call.

I think it’s important, especially for us “younger” leaders to holdfast to the specific call that God has spoken upon us. I think it is good to serve the local church and I don’t encourage anyone to necessarily stop because we might be doing things that will develop us into better servants, but we need to watch out for what we’re signing up to do. God is a God of specifics and I think it would benefit us to know and maintain those specifics in our own lives and ministries.

If another area of the church needs me, I will help. However, I won’t volunteer to consistently serve in an area that will take time or energy away from what I feel God has called me to do. The same can be said about any area of my life. I cannot afford to do a bunch of extra curricular activities that prohibit me from accomplishing the task that God has set before me.

Don’t do just to do. Be intentional about what you’re doing and what you’re working towards. Not only in ministry, but in every area of your life. Be disciplined enough to think long-term. Be confident enough to think big. Be courageous enough to think new. Never lose sight of the task(adventure) that God has placed before you and make every effort to work towards that.

Dead Flies

“Dead flies make the perfumer’s ointment give off a stench; so a little folly outweighs wisdom and honor.” -Ecclesiastes 10:1

When I read this verse, it confirmed a lot of things that I’ve been thinking about and learning lately about what it means to be blameless. In fact, that’s the word that God has been taking me through lately. What does it mean to be blameless? It means to be without fault. I recently read 1 Peter and the book was full of teachings about how we are supposed to be above reproach and blameless in the eyes of God and men so that they may not find any reason to accuse or fault us.

The aforementioned verse in Ecclesiastes reiterates, at least to me, that we really do have to watch every part of our lives at every moment of the day. We can be very wise and be held in high honor, but if we act will a small amount of foolishness or make a minor mistake, it will outweigh all of that wisdom and honor. I’ve definitely gone through this in my own life to know how true that is. There can be years of hard work, dedication, loyalty, faithfulness, and leadership that can easily be erased by a single mistake, whether it is big or small. 

As Christians, especially as people who hold leadership positions, we can’t afford to have dead flies fall into our ointment. We can’t afford to have a little bit of folly or foolishness in our lives because it can destroy all the good work that we do. We need to be above reproach. We need to be blameless. We need to strive to be like Christ in every area of our lives, regardless of where we are or who is around.

Bay Area

It’s beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.

For some reason, this quick trip back home made me more homesick than I had ever been since moving out here 16 months ago. I don’t exactly know why, though. Perhaps it was because it seemed like all was right in the world. My brother and sister-in-law were out there at the same time and it has become quite rare that we are all in the same place at the same time. Maybe it was because I got the chance to catch up with some old friends again. Maybe it was because I was able to walk through the church building that I grew up in as a leader for the last time before they moved. Perhaps it was the beautiful weather that endured through the days and nights. Whatever the reason, it sure felt good being back.

Almost too good.

I would be lying if I said that there wasn’t a moment when I wanted to stay there. It just all seemed so… familiar. Please, don’t get me wrong. I have a feeling that a lot of people take things the wrong ways. Just because I loved being home and everything that’s there, it doesn’t mean that I’m dissatisfied with where I’m at right now. God’s called me here and I’m enjoying every minute of it. I think we are all entitled to have feelings, though.

I love my church family back home. I really do. They really are like family and it felt good to walk into church and have a history with majority of the people there. It was also really nice being able to talk about worship with my boy too. It’s been a while since we were really able to do that. There are worshippers here who have an interest and desire to start leading worship, but unfortunately, they are all female. I can still teach lessons and give practical applications, but I can’t take the time through the week to invest in someone’s life like I was able to do with my boy. Worship starts off the stage and I feel like I was able to make a big impact on him that way. It’s a lot different when it’s a guy/guy rather than a guy/girl relationship. I can’t make the same type of investment in a girl and it kills me on the inside because I want to see other worship leaders develop. 

I owe a lot of my development to my senior pastor back home. Not necessarily because we talk about a lot of life lessons outside of church or anything, but he showed me what worship could be when we take down some barriers and expect the Spirit to move mightily in our midst. This last Sunday reminded me of that. Towards the end of worship, he came up and felt like the Spirit was moving in a certain direction and spoke it out. The result was a flood of people pouring to the front of the altar and getting prayed for. Chains were broken. Walls were crushed. Freedom was there. All in the midst of our worship time. The five song set that was originally planned ended up going an hour (although it felt like 30 minutes). This is the reason why I can’t settle for singing songs. I’ve seen and experienced too much of the Spirit moving in people that I have to contend for it more.

As much as I loved it back in the Bay, it feels good to come back home. I have the greatest group of friends here that I could ever ask for. I’m excited for the challenges of my new job starting tomorrow. I’m excited for the challenges of growing in different settings as a worship leader with different types of congregations. I’m excited for the challenge of growing worshippers into leaders. I’m excited for the challenge of growing myself. It’s time for the next level.

Genuine. Unprepared.

There’s a line in a song from my favorite band that says, “Genuine and unprepared. If you, you see something, then you should say something.” I know this is a secular song and isn’t talking about God whatsoever nor does it contain any biblical theology about worship, but I couldn’t help but think about worship when this line popped into my head today.

One of the things I love to do the most while I worship is to vamp on a chord progression and just let the music play. I like music a lot, but that’s not the reason why I do it. I do it because that’s where I feel like the most genuine worship takes place (in the context of a musical worship service). When there aren’t any words on the screen, you’re forced to think. There isn’t anything scripted out for you, so the only words that you have to sing are the words that spill out from your heart. They are unprepared. They are genuine. My desire in any time that I lead worship is to have God so reveal Himself to His people that their worship spills out uncontrollably.

The other reason why I love to do this is because when we close our mouths, we are more apt to hear God’s voice, and I believe that He speaks to us in the midst of our worship. In case you haven’t figured it out by now in all my worship posts, I believe that worship is far more than merely singing church songs. It is the time when I most encounter the presence of God and there’s nothing I desire more than creating the moments where other people can experience the same things.

If you see God and His revelation, you say (or sing) something in response. There are plenty of moments in any worship set, no matter what your style is or where you come from, where there aren’t any words on the screen. What are you going to do in those moments? Are you going to stand uncomfortably in the midst of naivety, or are you going to be so connected to God that your unprepared, genuine worship naturally spills out of you?

Embrace the mysterious unknown moments of worship. There’s a lot that happens outside of the organized.

Grandpa

“Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers.” -Proverbs 17:6

I read this verse today as a part of my devotions and it made me think of my grandpa, William H. McMullen Sr. I remember hearing (unless I’m completely mistaken) that he was the first of his family to come to know Jesus Christ as His Lord and Savior. That one decision has eternal implications and not just for himself, but for those who follow suit. When I was still living at home, I would hear countless amounts of people tell me how wonderful my grandpa is. They would tell me of his wisdom, his loyalty, his faithfulness, his desire to share his experiences and knowledge with others, and his overwhelming heart for God.

If I’m going to be honest, I’m a little disappointed in myself for not taking the great opportunity I had to learn from so great a man. Granted, he’s still alive so I can still talk to him, but it’s a lot more difficult now that I live a thousand miles away as opposed to seeing him at least once a week.

There has always been a part of me that has wanted to make him proud, almost as if it was my obligation to live my life in such a way that showed him that he did a great job and that he is truly leaving a legacy in this world. I think that’s a vitally important thing in this world and I know that beyond any type of monetary successes or endeavors, he would have me live a life that so pursued Christ that nothing else mattered. My dream one day is that he could be on the side of the stage one day that I get to lead tons of people into the presence of God through worship (although I’m sure he would rather be in the midst of that crowd, worshipping alongside). I want him to see that and to be able to tell him, “Grandpa, that’s because of you. You started that.”

Grandpa, I know you read this, so I might as well give a shout-out to you. You’re an incredible blessing to everyone you come into contact with. You’ve demonstrated without fault what it means to be a pillar for the church - unshakable and immovable, even in the midst of various earthquakes. I will live for God with everything I have, but I want you to know that I’m also going to live for your legacy as well and carry your name proudly. I know that “Mac” is my own identity, but I proudly carry the name “McMullen” everywhere I go because, to me, that points back to you. 

I love you and I can’t wait to see you again soon.

Normal

What is “normal” anyways, right? Don’t we often ask that question? Is normal just another word for the status quo? Whatever it is, I’ve lived in it for far too long now. There’s been a small part of me that has known that I’m not meant to be a part of the status quo. This doesn’t just mean in a worldly sense (as all of us are called to be apart from), but also amongst Christians. This doesn’t, by any means, mean that I’m called to be better, just that God has something different in store for me. I’ve always felt like God never let me settle for a standard way of living. My conviction has always seemed higher than most and I was never able to get away with the things that all of my friends could.

Over the last year I’ve been in Montana, one little phrase has always whispered inside the back of my head; “You can’t have a radical ministry without living a radical lifestyle.” Am I doing anything differently in my life that would enable my ministry to be any different than any other ministry? What is going to separate “my” worship services than anyone else’s?

l got the privilege of going out to lunch with my worship pastor last week. It’s been quite a while since we were able to do that, and I remembered why I liked it so much. Besides the fact that we can talk both baseball and basketball until our ears bleed, we can also talk worship. For so long, I’ve been hearing the phrase, “Ah, you’re still young, Chris.” But for the first time ever, he told me, “You’re not that young anymore, Chris.” While that may seem discouraging, it was enlightening. I appreciate people’s support in trying to tell me that my life isn’t ending anytime soon and that I still have plenty of time to accomplish what I want to, but it was even better to hear someone tell me to finally get on with my life.

I have a dream. A calling. An anointing that’s been confirmed numerous times over the years and if I’m going to be honest, it’s a call that I’ve tried to deny on many occasions. Who am I to ever be a “big time” worship leader? What makes me special at all? I’m not nearly as talented as any of the guys out there. I’m not even nearly as talented as the guys on my own team. So I’ve stuffed it down. Whenever people ask me what I want to do with my life, I never know what to tell them. I’ve never felt called to or even really had a desire to be a worship pastor at a church, but what am I supposed to say? “I basically want to be someone like David Crowder or Matt Redman who tours around and leads worship for thousands of people and has several worship albums and books out. Oh, and not only is that a desire, but I believe that’s what God is calling me to do.” Can you imagine all the responses that would play back in my head? They’re not fun ones to hear.

However, I can’t deny it anymore. I can’t deny that call. I can’t deny that desire. And I can no longer deny the lifestyle that’s supposed to accompany it. I’ve beaten to death the lesson that “worship is a lifestyle.” It is. I will preach that until the day I die, but if I’m really supposed to be a “big scale” worship leader, does that mean I need to be living a “big scale” life? What does that even look like? My worship pastor told me that in order to be a successful worship pastor at a local church, you have to spend a great deal of time in personal worship and prayer in order to properly lead your congregation into the throne room of God. Then he said it’s even more ridiculous for traveling worship leaders.

What am I really doing to take steps towards that? Where am I at with that calling? Last Sunday, I finished my Martin Smith book and it broke me. I don’t even know why it broke me or if the Holy Spirit just used random lines inside of that book to speak to me. Regardless, I broke. I realized that I can’t be normal anymore. I can’t keep pushing back the lifestyle that I know God’s called me to live just so that I can be more like everyone else. I have to press into Him because I know that is the only way that I can ever achieve anything great. I need to be worshipping. I need to be praying. I need to have that spiritual authority to be able to take complete strangers into the throne room of God.

About a week and a half ago, we had a random worship night in the downstairs of our new house. It was great. I felt the presence of God there, but for some reason, I wasn’t content. It was a great time of very Spirit-led worship. We didn’t have any agenda or preconceived direction. We just wanted to worship and me being the worship leader, decided to just go for it (I don’t actually know if everyone else was expecting me to or not, but I did). That seemed to be the beginning of a big stirring inside of me. The next day, I started asking people if they thought it was good and stuff and they all said yes, but I didn’t want it to stop there, so then I started asking the questions, “What difference did it make? Are you any different today than you were yesterday because of it?” I believe with all of my heart that if we have a true encounter with the Living God, there is no way that we can possibly leave the same person. That’s when I decided that that is how I am going to approach the calling that God has put on my life.

I know that if I chase the music, albums, tours, etc. then I’m never going to make it. Therefore, I need to pursue Him. I need to worship God with my heart abandoned. This is the only way that I’m going to be “ready” to do what He’s called me to do. I need to spend enough time in the presence of God that I am constantly being changed and constantly being set apart. The spiritual authority that comes with that is the only way that “my” worship services are going to make any difference. I want to see peoples lives break in the presence of God. I want to get beyond the music and beyond the songs. I want people to have a life-changing encounter and leave the building different than when they entered. 

That starts well before the stage. That starts with me being alone with God. It starts with a team that worships the same in a circle as it would in front of thousands of people. It starts with a hunger for more of God and an overwhelming desire to constantly be shaped more and more into His image. It starts with abandonment and it’s about time that I get there.

“Do not wait for man to delegate what God has already called you to do.” -Mike Larkin

What We Do

Do you ever stop and ask yourself how we should be going about life as a body of Christ? What kind of place is the church? Do we still see the church as a place or as a body of people - the bride of Christ? Our pastor on Sunday poised this inquiry: “True or False - The church is full of people who have their act all together” (the answer is false, in case you were wondering). After that, he inquired again: “True or False - The church is full of broken people who see the need for a Savior” (this time the answer is True). It got me thinking about conduct, secrets, and how I’ve lived as a member of the church for the past decade.

It’s interesting to think that we, as members of the church, tend to judge our fellow members of the church based on what we would like them to be. Should we only want to hang out with the “perfect” Christians? That seems pretty fake and hypocritical to me considering nobody’s perfect. That just means that we’re all getting along with our false realities. Somehow, I don’t think that’s what Christ wanted from His bride.

I am, in no way, trying to boast at all, but I have been told on multiple occasions that people like being around me because I make them feel at ease and comfortable, like they don’t have to fake anything for fear of judgement. Isn’t that what we’re supposed to be as a church? Accepting? Are we really that focused on the religion of how someone acts that we miss the connection that we could be giving them with Christ? I can’t stand when Christians don’t want to hang out with other Christians because they’re not “perfect” or exactly like them. I know personalities are different and maybe everyone doesn’t click that well, but what are we really expecting from each other?

In a worship comparison, it would be like me caring about everyone in the congregation singing the right notes in a song. My job as a worship leader is not to get people to sing a song, it is to get them so connected with Christ that the right worship automatically flow out of their hearts. We need to be more focused on peoples’ hearts rather than their outward conduct. No wonder so many people don’t want to come to church. We all give nasty glares when someone swears.

I have grown up and spent my entire life in church and have been involved in ministry for the past near-ten years. However, I have never felt like I could ever share my struggles that much because of how people would react. There always seemed to be a lack of grace and because of that, I had to try my hardest to act like the most perfect kid on earth. The reality, however, was that I wasn’t. Not only was I not perfect, but since I never felt like I could share my weaknesses, struggles, or flaws, I was never helped past them and they eventually came out in drastic ways.

I hope you’re not a cold shoulder. If you are, I’ll pray that you change. I’ve seen way too many people start to change their hearts for Jesus because they were originally accepted for who they were. We can’t afford to expect people to be perfect before we welcome them into the community of God. We need to accept them now as they are and connect them to Jesus and let the Holy Spirit change them. We might be able to change someone’s actions, but only He can change their hearts, and seeing as we are not saved by our actions, but by what we believe in our hearts, I’ll leave that up to Him.

People want something real. If the bride of Christ is fake, how will they ever get to experience Him?

Martin Smith

I have been reading a book called “Delirious” by lead singer, Martin Smith. It’s actually weird to label him as “lead singer” when after reading what I have of this book so far (which is almost half way), Martin Smith is really a worship leader. The only difference is that he leads as part of a band and not as a solo worshipper with musicians behind him. The book has actually been pretty… awakening, to say the least. As I have been reading through his story, it’s been crazy to read about his reflections on those times. Delirious didn’t form because a group of people wanted to start writing music and sell it. They started as part of a people movement in a small group that began holding worship nights every month. They (mostly being related) just happened to be the ones that played for it and it caught fire. “IT” caught fire. The band didn’t catch fire, but the spiritual movement of God through a group of people (that far exceeded the team itself).

In the last couple days (which is when I started reading this), Martin has really expanded my concept of writing worship songs. It’s hard to explain how, but there has definitely been some sort of awakening in my spirit.

I want to share with you a quote from the book that really captures what the genuine heart behind worship should be;

We’ve become too song focused, and in truth I believe that we need to be more worship focused. We’ve lost the ability to push aside the songs and replace them with twenty-five minutes of crying out, opening our hearts and heads with the raw worship of God who’s within us.

Last night as I laid in bed, I remember praying that I never wanted to write a worship song for the sake of writing a worship song. I want everything that comes out on paper to be a genuine expression of my heart. I don’t want to be in this for the music. I want to be in this for the glory of the Lord. I’ll leave you all with another quote that caught my heart;

I live for those moments more and more, for the times when heaven breaks through and what is broken is made whole. I believe with conviction that I’m personally in that time again, a time when God breaks into our everyday lives. Not that I ever left it, but as a band sometimes we could make such great sounds together that there wasn’t always enough room to allow God to take full control.

This is nothing new, and doesn’t it affect all of us in some ways? We can get “good” at what we do, whether it’s work, bringing up children, or marriage, and in that routine and ritual we can forget to stop and let God in.

Revelation and Response

I feel like I need to be up front about this before I start: I am, in no way, bashing or hating on modern worship. In fact, I am swimming directly in the middle of it and I love it. That being said, let us begin…

After reading and writing about the verse in 1 Peter 1 that I did two days ago (about the revelation of Jesus Christ, I couldn’t help but to ponder this more in a worship light. The way I see it, there are two parts to worship: Revelation and Response. While they walk directly hand in hand with each other, I don’t believe that they are on equal playing fields. For example, I believe that we have the ability to “respond” without the revelation of Christ, but not in true worship. True worship first comes with our Heavenly Father revealing who He is.

If this were true, then why is it that most modern worship songs have to do with our response than the revelation of who He is? Trust me, I’m not one of those guys who is against modern worship songs and believes that only hymns should be sung in church. However, I’m starting to appreciate the hymns more and more because they are full of the richness of God’s true character. Most of those hymns point directly to God, all He has done, and the hope we have for our eternal future with Him.

Most modern worship songs our about our response to Him, which is great, I’m not saying there is anything wrong with that. What I have started to notice, though, is that it’s so easy for our worship to become about us. Granted, we will never outright sing about ourselves the subjects of worship, but it becomes more about our response than the revelation of who He is. I’m even finding this to be true in my own songs. It’s so much easier to write and sing about our own emotions and actions because we are more in tune with them than we are with the mystery of our Creator. In other words, it’s easier to sing about our part than it is about God’s. I told myself that I wanted to start writing more “vertical” songs (songs directly about God), but to be honest, it’s just not as easy to do.

This is why I’m starting to love the hymns more and more. They are full of rich theology. They are writing as songs of praise and worship because of who God is. Why do you think songs and worship services seem to be more powerful during Easter and Christmas services? Each of those songs are typically pointing directly at who God is and what He has done. Songs declaring that He is risen and hope has come to the earth.  Those are things that we think about and praise bursts forth from our being. Our worship is powerful because it is the true, natural response that is resulting from the glorious revelation of Jesus Christ.

I have been leading worship for youth groups for almost nine years now. The interesting thing about this is the progression of worship that I have been able to see in students’ lives. You don’t see their worship grow without first seeing their understanding of God grow. Worship, even if it’s just a little bit, is going to be more music than actual worship unless they start to long for a bigger revelation of who God is.

I have been believing for years now that our generation is going to bring a wave of worship “revival,” but I’m realizing more and more that this will not happen unless there is first and foremost, a huge awakening of our hearts to see and grasp the understanding of God and the appreciation of the mystery before us. There is no way in this world that we can fully understand everything about God and because of this, He is forever revealing more of Himself to us, but we have to be aware. We have to open our eyes to see His work, His character, and His movement.

Maybe this is all something that I need to work on as a worship leader (or “lead worshipper” as Matt Redman would say). Maybe I need to start eagerly expecting God to reveal something new about Himself every time we come together for worship. If we’re going to be real with ourselves and each other as worship leaders, we tend to gauge a lot of our “success” by the responsive expression of our congregations. Perhaps we are the ones who need to worry less about the response and more about the revelation. While this is true, it’s not only up to us to do it, though. Everybody needs to have their own revelation of who God is. Can we help push people towards that? Absolutely. But when it comes down to it, our job is to show others how to respond to it.

Empty response is false worship. The more we understand about God, the more naturally our worship will flow out from us. If you’re a student reading this, then please, please, PLEASE do not let your view of God be the result of your worship. Let your worship be a result of your view of God. Read your bibles and take notes about our Savior. Really let the Holy Spirit open your eyes to the character of God. Read of all the things He has done. That Bible that’s sitting there (wherever it may be sitting), is full of the subject of our worship. That Jesus is real. The things He did are real. The things He said are REAL. And the more we start to understand this - the more we let the Holy Spirit REVEAL Himself to us - the more our hearts will respond in genuine worship. 

Holy Holy Holy

Is the Lord God Almighty

Are you simply just singing that or are you truly believing it?

If Necessary

(Is it necessary for me to start each post with a picture? I think not!)

“In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trails, so that the tested genuineness of your faith - more previous than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire - may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.” -1 Peter 1:6-7

I know I’ve said this time and time again, but it’s so easy to simply pass over certain words and phrases that we read in Scripture. This is why I’m currently not reading large passages, but am reading and rereading a few verses more intently. In the above passage, the thing that stood out to me today were the two words, “if necessary.”

This passage is (in a way) saying that we’re probably going to go through some ish (MAC translation). However, it’s at least going to be temporary… and only if it’s “necessary.” Does that part bother anyone else other than myself? If necessary? Really? I feel like that’s a trial in itself. To what people would God decide that it’s not necessary? Why does it have to be necessary for me to be grieved by various trials? Can my faith not be tested in any other way? If there are really people out there who God decides it’s not necessary for them to go through trials, then how is their faith tested? Someone please tell me I’m not the only one asking these questions. 

Ok. I’m choosing to accept that for now. Let’s move forward with this.

Our trials test the genuineness of our faith and our faith results in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. In a logical sense (A=B, B=C, therefore, A=C), is it then safe to assume that our trials result in the praise of our Lord? Or is it that our trials bring about the revelation of Jesus Christ and our hearts respond in praise? It is the revelation of Christ that brings our praise, after all… right?

(enter worship “stanza.” I say “stanza” because it seems more musical and thus, fitting for the “worship” theme). I’ve said before that one of my favorite lines in a worship song is found in the song “King of Wonders” and it says, “You reveal and we respond. You have shown there’s no one like You, God.” I know I can beat this subject to death, but it’s extremely important that we never lose sight of the true subject of worship. Revelation leads to response. Not the revelation of musical abilities. Not the revelation of style. It is the revelation of God Himself, and if we believe that He can and will reveal Himself, it shouldn’t matter what the musical abilities or styles are. Please, don’t feel like I’m judging anyone because I’m just as guilty of this as anyone else, but it does intrigue me. Music doesn’t reveal Christ to me. The Holy Spirit does.

(Ok, back to trials) So with everything I’ve read in the past couple months, it seems that trials are, well, a good thing (tada!). That’s what James says, right? “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing” (James 1:2-3). 

I don’t really have any grandiose conclusion to any of this. I do know that it’s pretty hard to always be joyful in the midst of trials. A joyful trials seems a bit of an oxymoron. Part of me wants to sum this up saying, “Smile! Good things happen when bad things happen.” Christ is revealed in the midst of our trials. Take joy in that revelation and respond in praise. Chances are, your trials are necessary. Be found with approval through your testing - maintain a genuine faith. 

mmm…

(Source: faithbecomeslove, via kiyokochan)

Being Guarded

“According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.” -1 Peter 1:3-5

I feel like I’ve gone over this sentence so many times, but there’s just so much in it that I can’t just pass over. Right now, I’m going to look at the fact that we are being guarded by God’s power.

Think about that just a little bit: We are being guarded by the power of God.

In this passage, Peter starts by saying that God has caused us to be born to a living hope to an imperishable inheritance, that He is keeping for us. Not only that, but He is also guarding us through our faith so that we may partake in that very inheritance.

Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve never really given much thought on the possibility of God guarding us for the sake of our inheritance. Have you? I haven’t sat in my room (or coffee shop… until now) and thought deeply to myself that God is actively participating in the protection of our personal inheritance.

Do I really have faith in God’s power? Am I really focused on my eternal, imperishable inheritance or am I focused on my earthly, temporary blessings? When I think of God’s protection, do I always think of physical protection or do I think of the spiritual protection of our faith? 

If I’m going to be completely honest, there are times when I lose faith. There are times when I start to doubt what God wants to do or that He really is going to do something with me. I know I’m not the only one who thinks or feels this way. But what is faith? Being sure of what we hope for and sure of things unseen. This is our protection. We don’t see what comes next. We don’t see our eternal inheritance, and because we don’t get to physically see these things, we start to lose our focus. There is hope for something more.

I think that those of us in ministry need to remember this all the more. The reasons we do things aren’t because of anything on earth. I’m not discrediting any of our work or the importance of seeing people come to Christ, but that is not our reward. A paycheck is not our reward. People are not our reward. Eternal life spent with our heavenly Father and Sovereign Creator is our reward. When we are struggling in our lives and in our ministries and don’t feel like we are accomplishing anything, we need to holdfast to that hope; have that faith and be sure of what we do not see. That faith is our protection. That faith unlocks the power of God over our lives. Be protected by faith. Allow the Lord to guard you.

I seriously miss watching this guy play defense. It was one of my favorite things to see in the entire world.

Trust With Confidence

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.” -Proverbs 3:5

When you hear and read the same passage of Scripture about a thousand times, it’s hard to glean anything new from it without actually diving in with a little more effort. I didn’t want to walk straight by this verse, but it also intimidates me to write about because it’s been done so many times in much more studious and eloquent ways than I could ever do.

The Hebrew word for “trust” in this verse can also be translated as “confidence,” and to “lean” is, essentially, to support. Thus, here is my very loose and not-so-very inspired or God-breathed translation of this verse: “Have full confidence in the Lord rather than trying to support yourself by your own understanding” (or something like that).

I briefly read over a commentary about this by Matthew Henry and in it, he said a statement that really summed up a lot of this verse for me. “That often proves best which was least our own doing.” I can’t even begin to tell you of all the times when I’ve thought that my way of doing something was the best. Majority of those moments are not times when I’ve heard God and decided to act differently. More often than not, I don’t even know or ask what God wants me to do. I just automatically think about it and choose a course of action. No wonder so many decisions fall flat. I’m leaning on a broken (and finite) understanding.

To me, having confidence in something not only takes trust, but it takes an understanding of what it is you’re having confidence in (that sentence makes sense, right?). Having confidence in the Lord, while it does take faith, takes an understanding of who He is. I can have confidence in Him because I have seen and heard of all the things He has done. We have the entire Old Testament full of His action in history (yes, we have more than that, too). I also have the previous (almost) 27 years full of His action in my own personal life. It would be foolish of me not to trust in Him.

Right now, I am putting all of my weight on this chair because I have full confidence that it is going to support me. Trust and confidence requires action. I need to start living with a more active confidence in who He is and start seeking His wisdom above my own. 

Oxygen Masks

It’s been a long time since I watched that particular favorite movie of mine, so I thought it was appropriate to include this quote.

What does a flight attendant say about oxygen masks? Secure your own mask before assisting those around you. They say this because if you help someone else first and don’t have time for your own, you’re done. If you secure your own, that allows you to help anyone around you who may not be able to help themselves. Lately… I’ve been forgetting my oxygen mask.

Two of my close friends sat me down during lunch last week and basically told me I needed to take a break. I hadn’t realized it, but I have led worship every night (except for two) for both Fusion and the Pulse ever since both ministries started. For those of you who may not realize, leading worship is actually a lot more tiring than it may seem. My two friends said that they could both tell one night at Fusion that I was trying so hard to worship for myself to be poured into that I wasn’t paying attention to actually leading at all. It was true. I was feeling so dry that I just needed to be filled up again. I had gotten so busy with everything going on that I had stopped worshipping on my own. I all of a sudden found myself with very little down time.

One of the biggest things they said to me was that they both cared more about me than about my worship leading. Somehow, that broke something in me. Maybe I had felt like I had to lead every week to find significance for myself. I ended up sitting out the next week for both ministries and (even though I still worked eight-hours both of those mornings) it felt nice. 

This weekend is where my break has truly been, though. I went on a self-date yesterday after work. I didn’t see or hang out with anyone. I just read, uploaded pictures, went to dinner, then read some more in my bed and slept in this morning. It was the first time I have slept in in almost a month. After cleaning my room (for the most part) and eating some pancakes, I am back at Off The Leaf where I can read, write, and relax some more. 

If you don’t take care of yourself, you’re going to lose your ability to take care of others. You can’t pour anything out if you’re not being filled up at all. Sometimes we get so caught up in doing things for others that we forget what’s not only best for us, but for them as well. Think about it this way: If you’re running at only 25%, then they are receiving only 25%. If I am taking care of myself and am making sure I am getting poured into, then it expands my ability to pour into others. It’s simple logic. You can only pour to the extent you have. If that defensive end who just ran a fumble back 75 yards into the end zone doesn’t get that oxygen on the sideline, he’s not going to be able to play the next series very well, which will affect the entire productivity of the defense.

As much as we “ministers” love to minister, it is a draining task. We need to make sure we put on our own oxygen masks first so that we are able to take of those around us. That’s not a selfish thought, either. It’s for their sake as well as your own. Listen to God and find your Sabbath. You need it more than you know. 

Thank you, Tyler Durdan